when an actress promise to ride on a horse down new york to advertise a film about ladt Godiva, the streets where jam packed with innocent bystanders and dignitaries.it has been long since any one had seen a horse.
james is one of those that most keep to orders.He saw a sign in the park saying "keep off the grass"----so he walked on the flower beds.
a very angry mother took her young son,Henry to see a famous surgeon."Doctor" she exploded,"can a lad of thirteen perform an operation for appendicitis on himself? the doctor laughed and shook his head wisely. the lady slapped her son across the face and shouted"so now, who was right? you put it right back".
a certain store keeper reported a fire in his establishment the very day he signed a new fire insurance policy. the company suspected fraud, but had no proof.the only thing the manager could do was to write the policy-holder the following note:"sir,you took out an insurance policy from us at 10:00am an your fire did not break out until 10:30am. will you please explain the reason for the delay?"
after performing some hair raising acrobatics, the pilot turned to his companion and said:"i bet half the people down there thought we where going to crash." 'half the people up here thought so too,"came the reply.
a teacher recieved a letter from the mother of one of her pupils:"dear miss,please dont give johnny any more homework. that sum about how long it would take a man to walk fifty times round the city caused his father to lose a days jwork. and after he"d walked it you still marked the sum wronged."
a man who smoked 100 cigarettes day went to the doctor with a racking cough and a sore throat. he could hardly speak. pointing to his throat he said hoarsely:"doc, cigarettes." the doctor said:" smoking them?" and the man replied:"No-- asking for them."
comment by rival when screen actor played dual role in pictures:"he had achieved his ambition t last to---co-star with himself."
a friend of mine ha been seeing a lot of my wife.The other day i said to him:"now see here,fred--this is my last warning:stop fooling around with my wife or am going to let ou have her."
A party of people where travelling by train and discussing why british rail was losing money.one old gentleman said it was due to faulty management.A lady in the corner thought it was due to too many people being employed.Another man thought it was due to laziness of the staff.Anotherwas about to give her opinion when they heard the ticket inspector coming and they all dive under the seats where i had been all along anyway.
written by MAYOWA OLUFEMI ALABI http;//www.proffessor-mayowa.blogspot.com
(visit http://www.saintmayor.blogspot.com and http://www.leaders-mayor.blogspot.com for more of best jokes)
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